I first want to start out by saying that this is something that I have prayed about first before posting it, as it is one of the toughest trials that the Lord has given me to endure outside of the separation from my wife in 2001-2003.
Being without the woman I truly loved and the reality of possibly losing the chance of spending the rest of my life with her was the first thing to totally bring me to my knees in complete surrender. The Lord used that time to humble me and help me to see my need to seek Him. During that trial I was led to ask God to come into my life and to change my hard heart so that I could accept the greatest gift we can ever receive, the knowledge of His Son Jesus Christ. I learned that by accepting Him as my Lord and Savior I would receive the forgiveness of sins and eternal life with Him. So although those were the toughest years of my life they were the best because I came to know and love my Lord and Savior.
Back to the reason I am writing this…
In 2009 I had to witness the pain and disappointment of many of my clients & former friends, to include some brothers and sisters in Chris. This happened due to significant financial losses they incurred from their real-estate investments which one of my companies, Genesis REI , managed. The crash in the financial markets and the dramatic downturn in the real estate market proved to be too much for me and my team to withstand. Although I did all that I could, to include liquidating all my corporate and personal assets, to ride it out and save what I could of my clients interest, my resources were not enough. I lost nearly $1mil in a losing effort.
I noted my personal losses not to justify anything but just to make it clear that I was truly vested in trying to avoid the downfall that affected me and most everyone who worked with and for me in 2008 & 2009. I am glad to say that there was no one who’s losses were nearly as close to the $1mil that I lost but I understand that the losses that many suffered were all relative. I say that to say, I know that the affects a loss of One dollar for one person can be significantly different than another and I understand that some of the losses that some people endured were devastating. Regardless of how much I lost, to include my personal residence, I truly am much sorrier for every dollar lost by my clients and friends on my watch.
This trial has caused me to lose something much more valuable than a $1million. More importantanly was the respect & trust of my former clients and former friends that were hurt during this time. Unfortunately, many people have chosen to say, write and support things to hurt me because they trusted me and I couldn’t fix the problems which ultimately led to their hurt and losses. In some cases I will agree that some things said or written were deserved. However, most of what was written or said was blatantly untrue, unfair and because of that even more Hurtful. .
Regardless of who, what or why certain things have been said, true or untrue, about me or others whom I worked with who truly had a heart to help my clients and friends, I want to humbly apologize for any roll I personally played in any investment losses.
With all of that said, I know with every fiber in me that all that I had and have is because the Lord blessed me with it. I tried to always glorify Jesus as his representative in and out of the office.
2 Corinthians 5:20 (NIV) – We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.
I asked for guidance daily when making decisions in my business as I do in my personal life. My biggest mistake is that I didn’t always follow what I knew the Holy Spirit wanted me to do and ultimately failed in honoring God. I am not sure if that is why He took away the business that He gave me, but I believe that those times when I relied on my flesh to fix things vs. trusting in what I knew the Holy Spirit wanted me to do, made things a lot worst. I still agonize over my letting down so many people, to include, my employees, my family, my friends and my brothers & sisters in Christ. I also still hurt from all that I personally lost, to include my home. But my greatest pain stems from my disappointment in Dishonoring and letting down my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
Knowing that I been such a disappointment to Him, I have great joy in knowing that He has forgiven me.
Hebrews 8:12 (NIV) – For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more.”
1 John 2:12 (NIV) – I am writing to you, dear children, because your sins have been forgiven on account of his name.
Matthew 26:28 (NIV) – This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.
Knowing I have hurt many, I pray that someday all those whom I have worked with and have hurt in some way will find it in their heart to forgive me.
Mark 11:25 (NIV) – And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
Matthew 6:14 (NIV) – For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
Matthew 6:15 (NIV) – But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Luke 6:37 (NIV) – “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven”.
1 Peter 4:8 (NIV) – Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.